Scary Thing This Morning

One of the side effects of my vestibulopathy is that I can't concentrate as well as I used to, because I have to use so much conscious effort to keep my head still so I can focus on things. This interferes with my ability to process information I'm reading, listening to, or watching on TV, so I usually do those things lying down on the couch so I can just let my head and neck be supported by pillows instead of muscles.

But this morning something scary happened: I was reading the weather forecast off the weather thingy on our cable system, and suddenly realized I hadn't understood a single word I read. Nothing. I tried again, and this time I picked up a few words like "light" and "showers" and I could understand the numbers, but didn't get what they related to. Like I could read and comprehend "70", but couldn't figure out if that was degrees, percent, or screaming madmen.

The whole experience was like reading something in some foreign language, but with no familiar-looking words, like in Croatian or Albanian.

Finally I got Mike to read the thing to me, and then I could process the words. It cleared up after a little while, but it sure scared me. If I lose the ability to read, life just won't be worth living. Seriously. A large part of my life is my books. I love books and read just about anything.

Damn this condition!! And Disability still says I can work.... right.

Lorri